Beauty

Tonight I found some beauty.  In fact I was privileged to sit in a room full of beautiful women, all there hoping to find some grace.  It was wonderful.  I am cynical of meeting new people to say the least, and seriously debated staying home and 'holing up' as I prefer to do.  But I mustered the courage and went.  I am so glad I did.

I met a wonderful woman tonight.  Her name is Wendy Joy Hart.  I found her through Meetup.com.  Going into this I thought surely this woman is selling something, or pushing something.  The last meetup group I joined was more of a way of drumming up business for the woman who led it than a meetup group.  I promptly quit that group.  But this one was so different.  I left feeling better, lighter, and happier than I've felt in years.  I learned a whole lot of new things, and hopefully made some new friends.   Beautiful friends.

Driving home I was struck by the fact that I was in a room full of beauty and could easily, very easily, have missed it.  These are the moments, the light I need to retrain my eye to see.  My memory to hold.  I had pictured this being a scary thing.  Me and all my baggage.  My deep deep shame and shyness to boot.  But whenever I am in a group of women who are real and honest I find that we all have baggage, and shame.  If we can just be real for a moment we find that none of us wants to be left out or judged.  We are all looking for love and a little acceptance.  That is my motto as you know choose love.  On my way to the group I kept telling myself, it'll be ok, just choose love.  It was exactly where I was supposed to be tonight, and I almost robbed myself of the opportunity.